"black girl booty": supply and demand

here, you'll find an open letter penned to Nicki Minaj by Chuck Creekmur, owner of AllHipHop.com. in the letter, he expresses his concern for the influence that Nicki's "Anaconda" album art might have on his daughter. He dictates his fatherly concerns by calling Nicki's image "ratchet sh*t" and saying that he wasn't "shocked" by her album art, but, rather, "disappointed" in the image of her "booty in a thong."

he then goes on to say: "As a man, I can appreciate the virtues of your perfect posterior. The dad guy is not a happy camper, particularly now that his lil' girl is transitioning into a young lady. . . I'm trying to raise a young girl that will eventually grow into someone greater than the both of us. I know that this requires great parenting, great education, great luck and an assortment of great influences . . . As she gets older, it will be harder for me to limit her exposure to you, especially if you continue to do headline-grabbing moves like the 'Anaconda' cover. I don't want to EVER see her posted up one day emulating you . . . Believe it or not, I care. I think you are dope. You've bodied some of my favorite artists on songs like "Monster." Yet the possibility of you transcending this gnaws at me, because I know you don't have to succumb to bottom feeding . . . I [removed a previous photo from the website as requested] based on what I think is a glimpse of what you really desire, which is to be a more positive role model of some sort for young girls who are under siege out in these streets. Now, you take this squatting position on the cover of a song called “Anaconda,” which I am sure the radio will play until its played out. I’ll be on Spotify though and so will my daughter when she’s with me . . . P.S. You think you could follow me on Twitter again?"

well, this is my response to him. though, i doubt he'll ever read it:

dear Mr. Creekmur,

let's get right to it. you're obviously concerned with the impact that Nicki's image will have on your daughter, but you don't seem very concerned with the general sexism, misogyny, colorism, classism, homophobia, transphobia, etc. that is present in the rap/hip-hop genre and what impact they might have on your daughter. i wonder if you've ever written any letters to some of your "favorite artists" that accompany Nicki on the "Monster" track that you seem to admire. where is your letter to Rick Ross condemning his description of/chuckling at date rape in "U.O.E.N.O."? what about your letters confronting some of your "favorites" in the music industry for their insistence on referring to women as bitches and hoes? how about writing some letters about the violent ways that sex gets talked about, i.e. "beat the pussy up" and "tear your ass in two"? have you written any open letters to Lil Wayne about his glorification of "long haired thick redbone[s]" and his apparent disdain for darker skinned black women, or the way that he and many others seem to desire women with a "black girl booty", but whose bodies otherwise align with white/Euro-centric standards of beauty (naturally or artificially)? yes, girls and women are indeed "under siege" out here. how do you think all of these things will affect your daughter, her self-image, her relationship with her body, her vision of/experience with men, her perspective on sex and relationships later in life? 

if you're wondering why Nicki Minaj poses for photos like this...

or why Rihanna and Beyonce' and others do this...

allow me to enlighten you. it's because the industry asks for it. demands it. it's because women who capitalize on their sexuality usually rise to fame quickly and gain visibility, while women who do not often fade into obscurity despite their talent. this isn't to say that these women don't have agency in choosing these poses. Beyonce’ has created a brand and a business, reaching a level of creative control and economic power that few women have, but it is difficult to ignore that she is in fact “playing the game”, often using her body and her sexuality as a selling point in an industry that is dominated by men. She has just as much selling power with men who fantasize about her as she does with women who adore her. Beyonce’ is undoubtedly one of the best entertainers of our time. She has undeniable musical talent which speaks for itself. She could, in fact, forego the overt sexual nature of her performances and music videos. She could abandon the leotards and high heels and long, flowing blond tresses (her natural light skin and European-like features are certainly something else to be discussed) and she would still be recognized as talented, but in an industry that so highly values sexual appeal, it is unlikely that she would have reached the level of stardom at which she now stands if she had not marketed herself as a sexy goddess. The wonderful thing about feminism is that it grants women (and everyone else) the opportunity to make these kinds of choices. She chooses to use her sex appeal, and that is her right, as it is the right of Nicki Minaj, Rihanna, and all other women.

i'm sure you've noticed that the most popular (and least popular) rappers and hip-hop artists write songs that glorify "the booty". Big Sean blew us away with the artfully crafted "Dance (A$$)" with ingenious lyrics like "i'm wondering if cupid gave you ass shots/ 'cause i'm in love with that ass" and "shake that ass, shake that ass, shake that ass/ shake that ass, shake that ass, shake that ass." 

Jason Derulo let us know how he feels about the booty with his unforgettable masterpiece, "Wiggle", in a collaboration with Snoop (Dogg? Lion?). "i got one question/how do you fit all that into them jeans?/you know what to do with that big fat butt/wiggle, wiggle, wiggle/ wiggle, wiggle, wiggle." 

i know you remember Bubba Sparxxx's "Miss New Booty", in which he and the Ying Yang Twins delivered the timeless refrain, "booty, booty, booty, booty rockin' everywhere/booty, booty, booty, booty rockin' everywhere/booty, booty, booty, booty rockin' everywhere."

back in '89, LL Cool J cited the booty as the reason for his infidelity in "Big Ole' Butt": "Brenda got a big ole butt/i know i told you i'd be true/ but Brenda got a big ole butt/so i'm leaving you." 

but rap and hip-hop artists aren't the only ones:

Spinal Tap "Big Bottom" (1984)

Trace Adkins "Honky Tonk Badonkadonk" (2005)

Queen "Fat Bottomed Girls" (1978)

KC & the Sunshine Band "(Shake, Shake, Shake) Shake Your Booty" (1976)

Every country song about a booty in "painted on jeans" (since forever)

our culture is obsessed with the booty. we love the booty. it's why nearly every woman on an action movie poster is in that awkward half-turn pose. it's why booty pictures are flooding Instagram every day. it's why all the fitspo Tumblrs preach squat, squat, squat to get a nice, round bottom. it's why Moguldom Studios is releasing the (much needed) docutainment film Bottoms Up investigating our preoccupation with the booty and the lengths to which women will go in order to obtain the coveted apple bottom. 

so, when Nicki Minaj strikes a pose that accentuates and celebrates her "big ole booty", she is supplying what society has demanded from her, but she is also exercising her agency and taking ownership of her body. if you feel that it's necessary to write letters to public figures about the impact that they might have on their (young) audience, then by all means, do that. however, you should also consider a letter writing campaign critiquing the culture that fosters the behavior that you find so distasteful. otherwise, you just come off looking like one more person in a long line of people trying to police (black) women's booties with their sexist/misogynistic/racialized ideas about sexual expression and the politics of respectability, and based on what you "think [they] really desire" to be. 

P.S. feel free to follow me on twitter, i guess.

"how a female dresses is her advertisement."

i keep seeing this quote, and variations of it, shared on social media recently:

"how a female dresses is her advertisement. if a female shows half of her body, she's asking to be disrespected. if she dresses classy, expect to be treated like a lady. how you're addressed lies on your attire. sexy is a spirit, not an outfit."

OR YOU COULD JUST HOLD YOURSELF ACCOUNTABLE FOR YOUR OWN ACTIONS AND TREAT ALL WOMEN WITH RESPECT REGARDLESS OF WHAT WE DECIDE TO PUT ON OUR BODIES AND STOP PROJECTING YOUR POLITICS OF MODESTY AND RESPECTABILITY ONTO WOMEN BECAUSE, CONTRARY TO POPULAR BELIEF, A WOMAN'S STYLE OF DRESS HAS NO DIRECT BEARING ON HER CHARACTER OR HER WORTH AS A PERSON AND IS NEVER A JUSTIFICATION FOR YOU TREATING HER DISRESPECTFULLY.

thanks.

body terrorism: fat vs. thin

i feel like i have almost certainly talked about this before at some point in life in a different space, but i feel the need to revisit this subject again. let me preface this rant by emphasizing the fact that i love and support all women, of all shapes and all sizes, and i absolutely support the celebration of our bodies; especially because, historically,  women's bodies have been policed, dissected, subjugated, and treated as property, among other things. this is true of other marginalized bodies as well, but women will be the focus of this particular discussion. 

as humans, we tend to organize things into binaries; good and evil, men and women, black and white, and so on. among these is the binary of fat and thin. of course a spectrum of various body types exists between these two categories, but we tend to use one of these two as identifying factors for our bodies and the bodies of others. the fact that we sometimes ignore the possibility of variant body types and sizes is problematic in itself, but what compounds the problem is the added fact that social attitudes encourage us to pit two polarizing categories against one another. thus, it becomes good vs. evil, men vs. women, black vs. white, and so on. in the case of fat vs. thin, it is undoubtedly a war that is being waged disproportionately on women's bodies. 

as i've said, i support the celebration of our bodies, but i have to also say that the celebration of fat bodies is personal for me, as i identify as fat. by the way, don't offer me any patronizing reassurances like "you're not fat. you're beautiful" or any variations there of. you may think that this is a compliment and you may even have good intentions, but when you say things like this, what you're really saying is that i can't be fat and also be beautiful. you're saying that fatness negates beauty and vice versa: if a person is beautiful, they can't possibly be fat, and if a person is fat, they can't possibly be beautiful. you're reinforcing a fatphobic, thin-centric (and arguably white/Euro-centric) standard of beauty which denies the very basic idea that beauty comes in all shapes and sizes, and all of these different forms of beauty should be acknowledged and celebrated. don't be that person. 

i see the celebration of fat bodies as vastly different than the celebration of thin bodies (or the bodies in between) because of the way that fat women are often shamed. those who are (both consciously and unconsciously) fatphobic, or fat antagonistic, tell us that we're unattractive, unfeminine, desperate, gluttonous, lazy, and unworthy of love. surely, you've heard (and/or told) many a joke about fat people and accepted (and/or perpetuated) stereotypes about us as truth. you all know how badly fat bodies get treated, whether you exist in a fat body or you have witnessed and/or participated in this treatment. people tend to say really rude, unnecessary, and assumptive things about fat people. 

#WRONG

this is why i am personally invested in fat women openly and publicly loving their bodies and declaring their self-worth in the faces of those who would rather fat women stay silent and ashamed. i love it when a woman, whether she identifies as fat, plus-sized, BBW, full-figured, or otherwise, celebrates her body, screaming it at the top of her lungs , typing it in all caps, or flaunting it on instagram. i celebrate with her, but i take issue when fat women denigrate thin women in order to assert their value and express their self-love.

i can certainly understand the desire to combat the class which has been culturally accepted as the norm and which has sometimes participated in the oppression and othering of your class. it happens within all oppressive institutions; some blacks become anti-white and some women become anti-men. it happens even within marginalized groups, like some blacks becoming anti-light skin (i must confess, that i was guilty of this particular transgression once upon a time). it's normal to take all of the anger that you feel as a marginalized member of society and direct it at those who are more privileged, but it's unproductive. so, when fat women celebrate their bodies by denigrating the bodies of thin women, they are being unproductive by simply contributing to a culture where it is acceptable to spread hate among those who are different.

here's an example of what i'm talking about.

i'm sure that whoever made this was just trying to make "thick girls" everywhere feel great about their bodies, and that's all good. however, it comes at the expense of thin women, and there in lies the problem. there are so many things wrong with thinking of women's bodies in this way. thin women are not "bones" to be chewed on by dogs and fat women are not "meat" to be consumed by men. women's bodies are not for men or anyone else (also, sex is not something that men do to women, and i say this because i read this image as a metaphor for sex). 

so, here's a novel idea: let's try celebrating our bodies without demonizing the bodies which are different from ours. loving your own body does not necessitate hating a body that is different from yours, even if that body type is accepted as the "norm". we do not have to devalue someone else in order to provide evidence for our own value because WE ARE ALL VALUABLE. 

there is a stark difference between the celebration that is happening in these images...

...and the devaluing of thin bodies that is happening in these.

it doesn't matter what your body type is. give yourself permission to celebrate it. 

"not all men"

last week, a lonely guy named Elliot Rodger decided that he would set out to “slaughter every single spoiled, stuck-up, blonde slut” because his life as a 22 year-old virgin was an unbearable existence. following his shooting rampage in which several people lost their lives, journalists and bloggers have used this event to voice their concerns about the culture of violence in the U.S (especially among mass murderers who are almost exclusively young, white males), contributing to already ongoing dialog about mental illness, gun violence, and white privilege, among other things.  

just in case you haven’t read it, here are few disturbing quotes from Rodger’s lengthy manifesto:

“Women should not have the right to choose who to mate and breed with. That decision should be made for them by rational men of intelligence. If women continue to have rights, they will only hinder the advancement of the human race by breeding with degenerate men and creating stupid, degenerate offspring.”

“There is no creature more evil and depraved than the human female. Women are like a plague. They don’t deserve to have any rights. Their wickedness must be contained in order prevent future generations from falling to degeneracy. Women are vicious, evil, barbaric animals, and they need to be treated as such. … All women must be quarantined like the plague they are, so that they can be used in a manner that actually benefits a civilized society.”

“The first strike against women will be to quarantine all of them in concentration camps. At these camps, the vast majority of the female population will be deliberately starved to death. That would be an efficient and fitting way to kill them all off. I would take great pleasure and satisfaction in condemning every single woman on earth to starve to death.”

and yet, people are questioning what fueled Elliot Rodger’s actions after he blatantly displayed his hatred of women and desire to murder us all (though he only seemed to be interested in blonde women). let’s just call it what it is: MISOGYNY. some people seem hesitant to admit that misogyny is evident in Rodger’s actions, or that misogyny is evident EVERY DAY, or that it compromises women’s safety. 

we seem to be far more comfortable with discussions of white privilege, mental illness, and gun violence than we are with identifying the ways in which misogyny hurts women. in fact, we're far more adept at derailing the conversation about women's safety than we are at actually having a conversation about women's safety. this isn't to say that all of those other issues aren't important and legitimate issues that should be discussed, but they should not be used to drown out the discussion about women's safety, misogyny, and male entitlement.

Elliot Rodger is just another face in the crowd of men who feel entitled to women's bodies and use violence to retaliate when they are rejected. unfortunately, these things happen on smaller scales every day. predictably so, in response to women openly discussing misogyny and their every day experiences with it, “not all men” has been the argument from apologists and deniers, as well as those who consider themselves to be allies. dudes, we already know. we know that “not all men” are violent or sexist or misogynist. we know that “not all men” would rape and murder us. we know that “not all men” are bad, but that’s not the point. the fact that your sensibilities might get a little twinge when we talk about misogyny and sexualized/gendered violence is not the point. the point is that SOME MEN are misogynists and SOME MEN perpetuate sexualized/gendered violence against women. and until you have experienced what it is like to be on the receiving end, then you do not get to tell us whether or not our fears and concerns are legitimate. 

until you've been a woman and had lewd comments screamed at you while walking down the street, or you’ve been groped in public without your consent, or aggressively approached and cornered in a parking lot, or harassed online, both in and out of internet dating spaces, or received an unsolicited dick pic from a man you barely know. until you've been threatened, antagonized, and insulted by a man because you exercised your right to reject his sexual advances, or been ostracized and guilt tripped because you didn’t return a man’s romantic interests and resigned him to the imaginary “friend zone”. until you've been sexually assaulted by strangers and told to take it as a compliment. until you've been hassled at a club or  bar and the only thing that gets him to leave you alone is to lie about your imaginary boyfriend. until you’ve experienced all of these things (and more) which make you afraid, uncomfortable, and mortified, YOU DON'T KNOW. you don't know what it's like to be afraid of what might happen if you say "no." and because YOU DON'T KNOW, you do not get to tell us that our fears are not legitimate. you do not get derail the conversation and make it about you, even if it is simply to reassure us that “not all men” do those things. we already know that. just like we already know that white privilege, mental illness, and gun violence are also valid concerns. all of these conversations are important, but granting attention to them should not divert attention from discussions about women’s safety in this world. 

confession: i was sexually assaulted

sexual assault: sexual contact with another person without their consent. forcible, coercive, or otherwise.

i was sexually assaulted repeatedly throughout my middle school and high school years, but it wasn't until adulthood that i was able to identify and accept it as sexual assault. against my will and without my consent, various male students grabbed and slapped my butt, groped my breasts, pulled my bra strap, aggressively commented on my body, inquired about my sexual practices, and blatantly called me a liar when i answered that i was a virgin. i was harassed, objectified, slut shamed, bullied, and ultimately dehumanized. i thought it was normal and i thought that it was my fault. i thought that the body in which i existed warranted that kind of treatment from boys. i was told to take it as a compliment because it meant that they liked me and, you know, boys will be boys.

the first of these incidents is still vivid in my mind. it was during recess in the fourth grade and i was playing on the jungle gym. it was one of my favorite things to do on the playground as i was an avid climber as a child. i loved viewing the world from atop trees and jungle gyms where i felt closer to the stars. on that afternoon, i mounted the jungle gym with the usual excitement in pursuit of that familiar rush. as i pulled myself upward, i felt a hand on my butt, squeezing tightly. in shock and confusion, i lost my footing then tumbled off and onto the ground. when i rose to my feet, i was seething with anger. i felt violated and i demanded to know who had done it. the bystanders pointed to the culprit who seemed unmoved by the scene unfolding before him. without waiting for his confession of guilt (i tended to shoot first and ask questions later as a girl), i lunged at him with the full force of my rage-filled body, kicking and punching. he fought back, slapping me on the side of my face until my ear was burning and i began to feel light headed. after the fight, i gave the teacher an accurate account of why the altercation began, but the boy denied it. i argued my case vehemently, but ultimately, there was no punishment given. we missed out on the rest of recess that day, but he was not appropriately disciplined for his actions. apparently, a boy grabbing a girl's butt on the playground was not an offense that warranted attention because it was just something that boys did to girls. this was all a part of my (mis)education. in that moment, i learned that sexual violence was something that boys do to girls. sexual violence became normalized. boys do it to girls, and by extent, men do it to women. 

as girls, we learn that our bodies do not belong to us, and it is a lesson that we continue to learn as we grow into women. the wide acceptance and normalization of this kind sexual assault contributes to the pervasiveness of rape culture. it took me years to unlearn all of those lessons and i am still unlearning some of them. my body does belong to me and no one has the right to touch, grab, squeeze, caress, or embrace my body without my consent. women's bodies do not exist for the pleasure of men and deserve the ability to move throughout this world free from violation. women's bodies deserve the same respect and autonomy that is afforded to men's bodies. women's bodies are not things to be hidden or ashamed of. women's bodies are not public spaces. women's bodies are wonderful. our bodies belong to us. this is not an indictment of all boys and men. this is an indictment of the misogynistic ideals by which some boys and men (and women) justify their sexualized violence against girls and women, and this is a position which i will continue to defend vehemently, unyieldingly, and unapologetically for as long as i continue draw breath.